In the Dog House

I started a new blog at a diabetes website recently.  For years I have stayed away from the diabetic community, because I just don't want to be one of those people whose daily life revolves around their blood glucose meter and their A1c test.  Lately, though, I could use some moral support from others who have been there, or ARE there.  I never did read the guidelines or rules for posting at this website, because, after all, I would never break the rules!  Rules are for people who would use profanity and that kind of stuff, and that is not me.  So I happily wrote a post about how much I like T-Tapp and how much just that one little move, Hoe-Downs, is doing for me, and I mentioned T-Tapp on a couple of forum posts.  Whammy, just like that my post was deleted and I got a warning in my mailbox about breaking the rules.  It seems new members are not allowed to post links.  

Huh.  Okay... so I re-post, this time without the links, and blammo! That post was also deleted by the moderator.  We are not allowed to promote other websites, and furthermore, we are not allowed to discuss moderators' decisions!  My profile at that other site now has a new tab marked INFRACTIONS! (**gasp** It feels like the Scarlet Letter!)  Indignantly I wrote a heated response to the moderator about this is America and I have freedom of speech, and I'll just go back to my other blog, and I bet religious discussions aren't allowed, either! And then I deleted all that indignation and responded meekly, "Thank you for telling me," and went away with my head down and my tail between my legs.  

I understand it.  Someone else owns the site, it's not really my blog, etc.  But I ran back here where I'm comfortable, to hide and to nurse my hurt feelings. :)  

So as I was saying, I have had Type 1 diabetes for over 30 years now, and I should be one of those forum experts who helps encourage others with diabetes.  But for about the past 28 years I have not kept caught up on diabetes developments or treatments or theories, so I am like a newbie. No one can MAKE you do something good for yourself, and I have, in a perverse way, hugged that truth for years.  Maybe that's because it's the one area of my life that I am in control of.  

But I was watching T-Tapp testimonials on YouTube the other day and somehow I got inspired.  Doing Hoe-Downs after meals is helping me keep my blood glucose under control and it's giving me more energy.  Yesterday my kids told me I look thin!  (Yes, they are silly.  I don't look any skinnier.  I think I was reaching up and stretching or something.)  For the first time in a very long time I feel encouraged to be ON TOP of my diabetes rather than on the underside of it.  And I am kind of excited.

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Okay I feel better now.  It's always a good idea to count to 10.  Or 1,000,000.  :)